Oh yeah baby…it’s that time of year again.

The other day, my kids and I were recalling some of the fun costumes they have worn over the years and then just for kicks, I tried to remember what get-ups I had cobbled together as an enthusiastic but poorly organised youth. I was surprised to find that my creative endeavors were anything but! I am embarrassed to admit I deferred to the ‘hobo/home-less’ person option on more than one occasion. Now before you all lose your s**t crying, ‘cultural appropriation!’ let me explain that my obvious socio-economic insensitivity was clearly a result of my generation being less-enlightened about political correctness…

or not, here’s a thought, maybe I didn’t think anything of it at all because it was just a costume so I could go out for free chocolate. It never, ever occurred to me that donning any of these different, maybe edgy outfits and their equally ridiculous accessories (I’m looking at you empty wine bottle in a paper bag…aaaah, alcoholic-stereo-type appropriation) were anything but a fun escape from our everyday 80’s acid wash and not some adolescent shade thrown at the poor unfortunate human being who was trapped in that circumstance and struggling to find validation and acceptance in the life they led or hey, maybe they were completely satisfied in their chosen path, I mean you just never know…for real, it is exhausting acknowledging all the possible options…Bruh!

Let’s face it, some costumes were chosen simply for their ease and no-brainer-ness (is that a word?) hair-curlers, face mask and house-coat…aaaah, house-wife stereo-type appropriation!

When did everybody get so ‘sensitive’? Now we have to be careful our fun isn’t being inconsiderate to someone else’s issues or culture or predispositions or food sensitivities or shoe size or toothpaste brand …

Where does it end? What about inanimate objects? ‘that Starbucks crappuccino cup costume wasn’t clearly labelled recycleable, I’m offended’ and ‘that pizza slice wasn’t vegetarian, I’m offended’. What about animals? ‘that giraffe costume isn’t portraying the spots properly, I’m offended’. ‘Dodo bird? Dodos are so extinct, are you making fun of their non-existence? …offended!’

What about bumming out my Halloween? Where’s the justice there? My right to an uncomplicated, candy-heavy holiday in my choice of disguise, what about that? The thing is, I honestly can’t recall anyone in my life ever wearing a particular costume to make a point. It was always just a bit of fun, a chance to step outside of yourself and pretend to be something or someone else. No harm intended.

And so, I am officially declaring October 31 ‘No Shame Allowed Day’. Nothing is forbidden, no topic taboo and if you are prone to being accosted and upset by fun and/or questionable taste, maybe go see a movie. It will all be over soon. Also, if anyone out there wants to rock the feathered, over-teased, sky-high hair and neon fashions of the ‘olden-times’ I can totally hook you up (without prejudice).

Wishing the best, tactless, over-the-top…scandalous even, seasonally appropriate (or not) hi-jinx and thrilling holiday excess for all …and to all a good fright!

Halloween Howdy!